R.I.P. Rockie

Three days before I was scheduled to be induced, Rockie ( our wonderful Lab/ coon hound/ shepard mix) took a turn for the worst. He had been going through a lot of issues for the past 6 months but had been getting better.
Well, all of a sudden we noticed bruises on his belly.. with in a week his whole tummy was like a huge black and blue bruise... it was internal bleeding.

We had done everything we could to make Rockie better but it was now time to make a choice... How could this happen??? Rockie is the best dog in the world, the most loyal, he's been here for me through thick and thin, the one that listened to me when I needed someone to talk to. He gave amazing hugs and he was an AMAZING dog. I just wanted Maddox to know Rockie. I had been praying that Rockie would get through his sickness and be there for Maddox, atleast for the first 5 years... was that too much to ask? Rockie was only 8 years old... I wasn't ready to let him go.

But, we had to, I couldnt watch him suffer and be in pain, he couldnt get up anymore and he was only holding on because I couldnt let him go. We took him to the vet and said our goodbyes. Justin ( my husband ) couldnt stay in the room. My father was there with me and also my friend Brent (which was my ex boyfriend who originally got Rockie with me).
I held Rockie and gave him so much love and pet his ear, the way i always do, i held his paw and I told him it was okay. I promised I'd see him again and I promised Maddox would know about him. I told him how much I loved him. He looked up at me as I kissed his nose, he finally fell asleep. In moments he was gone. And I was heart broken.
I walked out of the room and my husband held me as I cried. We finally got to the car, I didnt want to leave Rockie... My mom pulled up from Va Beach just in time... she got there to be there for me.

Though this was one of the hardest things I've ever had to go through, my mom did make an astonishing discovery for me... she told me, "Amanda, do you realize what Rockie did for you? He waited, he spent all the time he could with you, then he decided it was time because he didn't want to be a burden when you were reaching a time in your life that is the hardest. He chose this time, so that you wouldn't mourn for him but instead be happy with your baby, your family that you hoped so long for. He loves you and he did this for you."
Of course at the time, it angered me, I'd rather have him hear with me... I miss him. I love him. But I do truly believe he knew the right time to go, if there is one... because though I mourned heavily for him for the next couple days, I was quickly distracted by nervousness and excitement for the new life that was going to join our family.

I know Rockie is somewhere running in a field, loving life, with all the toys he can imagine!